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Parenting with Connie: “I know it when I see it”
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Anonymous user Tue Nov 30, 1999 00:00:00 PST
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0 responses 0 comments “I know it when I see it.” These were the words of Associate Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart in a 1964 case before the court concerning pornographic films. “I shall not today attempt further to define the kinds of material ... but I know it when I see it,” he said. Where ISN’T pornography? I see and hear it everywhere. It has permeated all forms of media that I can think of, including TV, Internet, video games, cell phones, music, music videos, movies, radio, talk shows, cartoons, commercials, and soon iPods. Can somebody please stop this freight train of obscenity barging into our homes and attacking our minds? Our brains are wired a certain way, especially males. Most of you don’t know this, but we are the same gender until about six weeks in utero (not a country in Europe, like my students think.) At six weeks, the male brain gets a testosterone wash that defines male characteristics. The testosterone severs 60 percent of the connections between the left and right side of the brain. (No, he is not brain damaged!) He just thinks and processes differently. More importantly, a male's brain reacts to visual images more so than a female brain. Consequently, a male is more susceptible to pornographic images adversely affecting him. That is why most pornography is directed toward a male, but I will not dispute the fact that females get involved with pornography, also. For my students, I define pornography as something they see and their brain screams "WHHHOOOOAAA" while their stomach churns "UUGGGHHH." It is something that their brain will not forget, as hard as they try. For example, if you go to a movie and there is a sex scene, what do you remember about the movie? The same holds true for books. Pornography can be progressive and addictive. For example, the first time you rode Viper at Magic Mountain, it was an absolutely terrifying thrill. But if you rode it 15 times in a row, it wouldn’t give the same thrill. So you moved onto another ride. Same for pornography. In order to get the same amount of excitement, the person progresses to something more graphic or even perverse. After a person looks at pornography for a period of time, they are still seeking to heighten the thrill, so they fantasize about trying those things on humans. At some point, they may cross the line. The worse case scenario is Ted Bundy, a serial killer who admitted to being addicted to pornography. But he also had proclivities toward violent pornography (“Fatal Addiction”). People who don’t see anything wrong with pornography are not trying to have a healthy, mature relationship. Pornography becomes an impersonal exchange. I tell my students that pornography is a cheap counterfeit. It is worthless and can get you into a lot of trouble. They will eventually want the real thing. (Although some of them think they are ready now.) Pornography is accessible at your children’s fingertips. Whether by the TV remote control or computer keyboard, it’s out there. Your child gets thousands of sexual images bombarding their brains each year. I can usually tell which students look at pornography because they have "garbage going in their brain, garbage going out their mouths.” They are filling their minds with trash: garbage in, garbage out. We need to get the trash out of our homes. My trash day is Thursday, when’s yours? E-mail Connie at: cmoustakis@bak.rr.com

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