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‘Nobody knows what troubles I’ve seen’
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Anonymous user Tue Oct 3, 2006 10:33:26 PDT
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0 responses 0 comments “Nobody knows what troubles I’ve seen.”
The words of that old spiritual describe how caregivers of older family members sometimes feel.
When they start venting to their non-caregiving friends, their friends are quick to give advice –– much of it impracticable.
That’s why Children of Aging Parents (CAPs) was started about a decade ago. It is a national nonprofit organization which now has support groups in many cities across the United States, including Bakersfield.
The local chapter meets on the second Tuesday evening of the month from 7 to 9 p.m. at Westminster Presbyterian Church, 2080 Stine Road, between Ming and Wilson. (It is important to note that this is not New Stine. East of Copeland’s Sporting Goods, the church is just south of the car wash on Stine.)
At some meetings, we sit around and trade caregiver “war stories” or problems and solutions. It helps to laugh and cry with others who are going through similar experiences.  At other meetings we have speakers.
CTAP (California Telephone Access Program) sent a speaker who brought a whole table full of specialty phones with a choice of large buttons and/or loud ringers or lights and/or earpieces which amplify the sound for those who keep asking,  “Can you talk louder? I can’t hear you,” and the application forms which need to be signed by a doctor or audiologist. This equipment is loaned free of charge because of a small monthly fee each of us pays with our monthly phone bill.
We’ve also had someone from a personal care agency demonstrate an automatic pill dispenser for those who have trouble remembering to take their medicine. Several times over the years our speakers have been different elder law attorneys who have explained the intricacies of Medi-Cal law and how they set up trusts so the person does not have to “spend down” before using Medi-Cal to pay for care in a nursing home.
At our Oct. 10 meeting the speaker will be John Corse, President of Kern Home Care, which provides caregivers for families who want to hire someone without going through an agency. We will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of doing this.
At the Nov. 14 meeting, Rob Rephan, education and prevention specialist with the Alliance Against Family Violence and Sexual Assault, will talk about what we and our elders can do to prevent becoming a victim of assault.
At a conference last May entitled “Investigating and Prosecuting Sexual Abuse of Elder and Dependent Adults,” I learned 18 percent of women raped each year are at least 60 years of age. The majority of assaults involving “elderly” women, most of whom were able to function independently, took place in the victim’s home by an assailant who was unknown to her. But there are things one can do to make the home safer from assault by intruders, or to summon help if someone gets in. Even non-elderly persons need this information.
If you would like more information about the support group, call Health Care Planning and Education for the Elderly and Their Families at 831-1132.

–– Audrey Cochran is a member of National Association of Professional Geriatric Care Managers, and received her MSN from Cal State Bakersfield in 1990.

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