Hey, Dad...

I lost my dad two years ago, so it will be nice to have someone like you around.  :)

~Dana

 Dear Dana and readers,

Anytime you have a question or a problem that you want to discuss, just ask.  I am here for you and I will give you my full attention.  I check my blog daily so don't hesitate to write.

Take care,

Dad

  "Hey, Dad," is written by contributing columnist Dwayne Ardis.

 Dear Dad,

I am a mother of three children (not toddlers). My husband is a good father but he doesn't always present the best example for our sons. I expect my sons to learn how to take care of the yard and take responsibility when they’ve made a mistake. My husband should be a Christian example, the father of our household, and other things. I am concerned that no matter what I try to teach them, our sons will grow up and mirror their dad, as boys seem to look to their father as their main example in life. I have tried talking to my husband about how our sons will mimic his actions (or lack of action), but he doesn't seem to get it. What can I do?
Frustrated

Dear Frustrated,

We live in a generation that places a high value on education and careers.  Men spend years preparing and training to improve our job skills, yet many men enter fatherhood with little or no training at all.  We have to learn as we go.  Your husband is probably doing the best he knows how.  In past generations, dads had the benefit of other male role models like their own fathers, uncles and friends of the family.  If it is possible, encourage your husband to talk with other men that will give him good advice and help him to be more involved in a positive way.  You can encourage him and praise him when he does the right things.  Men respond to positive motivation.  Don’t criticize him, but support him.  Thoughts of failure and inadequacy may cause him to give up, leave, become overbearing from trying too hard, or develop a passive attitude and fade into the background of your children’s lives.  Don’t wait for your husband to assume his leadership role.  Get your husband’s support you if you have to be the temporarily “authority” figure to your sons.  I would also suggest counseling from your pastor or a family counselor.  Your boys need both parents working together with common goals.  Don’t give up on your sons or your husband.
Take care,
Dad

"Hey, Dad," is written by contributing columnist Dwayne Ardis

Dear Readers,

Since I didn’t receive any questions this week, I thought I would take this opportunity to discuss something with you that has been on my mind.  As parents, we have to be more involved in our children’s education.  We are too quick to blame the teacher or the school system for the poor grades our children are getting.  Ask yourself this question, what are YOU doing at home to help your child get the most out of his or her education?  

Here are some suggestions:

1. After school, let your child play for an hour.  They need the break and they need the exercise.

2. Have them do their homework at the kitchen table.  This helps keep the child focused on their homework and helps you be available for questions.

3. Keep the TV, radio and other distractions off during homework time.

4. Once the homework is done, go over it with your child and make sure there are no errors and it is understood.

5. Schedule meetings with your child’s teacher or keep in contact via email.  Work together with the teacher.  If time permits, volunteer to help out in the classroom.

6. Praise and encourage your child to do the best they can in school.  Children love our support and admiration, and they will work hard to get it.

7. Dad’s, you get involved too.  You may be better in one subject than mom, and your involvement will show your child that you both care.

8. When in the car, pop in a book on tape instead of a DVD movie.  You can pause the tape to discuss the book and what is going on.